The following presentation was brought to you by a 13-hour transpacific flight with complimentary alcohol.
So, you’ve got hours to kill in the presence of booze and you’re on your own. Lucky for you, the Switch is as portable as you are, and this game is as potable as the finest liquor you’ve got handy. A vodka cranberry makes for a nice red health potion to keep you going, or you can choose to have breath of the Wild Turkey. Whatever drink you choose, just try not to drop your game on the floor of the plane during turbulence.
We’re going to start you off strong at the beginning of the game by having you drink every time your name (Link, not your actual name) is said in-game. That’s pretty frequent at the start and then trails off into a couple mentions every great while during a cutscene. With that head start and the rest of the rules, you’re sure to pass the time quickly (or just pass out quickly) on whatever voyage, night in, or bender you happen to be on.
Someone says Link’s name – 1
Lose a full heart – 1
Run out of stamina – 1
Break a weapon – 1
Fast travel – 1
Gain a Spirit Orb – 1
Complete a side quest – 1
Complete a main quest – 3
Gain a new health heart or stamina track – 5
It starts to rain…again… – 1
Rain stops you from climbing mid-climb – Finish your drink while you wait…and wait.
The Blood Moon Rises – 5 or a shot
Stay at an inn – Sip an energy drink if you’ve got one, or water
Die – Shot
Die from lightning – 2 shots
If you manage to play the entire game by these rules write to us, but please don’t send us your medical bills. Drink responsibly.