Diablo III Drinking Game

Players: 1-4

PS3, PS4, PC, 360, Xbox One


So, this is a very basic drinking game, but it’s also very close to my heart…

A bunch of us used to live together in a three-story home that we rented in a not-so-wonderful area of St. Louis (it helped bring us all closer together…sorta). We all worked for the same company, and they didn’t have hours on Sundays. This meant that every Saturday night and all of Sunday we’d basically be partying. This is where Diablo came into play, and, well, we were fans of the infamous Fireball, due to its inexpensiveness. Plus, for a shot choice, it went down easy. And that was vital to how we played Diablo.

To add further context, we were also on a Sunday Funday volleyball league. We were awful, and what contributed to that was the amount of Fireball we’d drink because of this game before heading off to our match.

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Actual photo of us drunk at our volleyball game.

So, with way too much story now and not enough drinking, here is the game…

The Equipment Drop Shot

Whatever the rarest weapon type/color that drops for the area you’re in drops, everyone takes a shot.

“Wait, we just had three orange drop off of that boss, so just on…” No, take three shots.

I recommend a shot that you don’t mind having a lot of. Due to the rarity of such drops (sometimes), it really needs to be a shot of something. And it makes things much more exciting when it happens.

Diablo Rare Drop Drinking Game

Well, fuck.

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Tomb Raider (2013) Drinking Game

Players: 1

PS3, PS4, 360


I’ll admit, I never touched a Tomb Raider game until this one, but my girlfriend enjoyed the series back in its heyday. The definitive edition was available on the PlayStation store for $5, so it seemed like an easy purchase. Of course, we’d sit down and immediately make a drinking game for it.

wet lara croft tomb raider

I didn’t even know there’d be clips like this before buying.

We found ourselves highly entertained with the game we conjured up, especially on some of the more ridiculous rules (we definitely made it a shot for when THE Tomb Raider says she hates raiding tombs). It’s technically a single player rule set, but I do suggest it with a friend. It’s easy to pick up at any spot, and the only variation to the rules is you only drink for your own deaths.

I would imagine most of the rules apply to Rise of the Tomb Raider, as well, but I can’t be 100% sure on that. It could also apply to the older games… but probably not well.

lara croft evolution timeline

Just, uh, take your pick.

The Game

Lara Curses – 1

You Fall (Any Fall) – 1

Particularly Long CS – 1

Lara Says “Sam” – 2

Someone Grabs You – 2

Perform a Finishing Move – 2

You See a Dismantled Airplane / Helicopter – 2

Find a New Weapon / Upgrade – 2

Find a Voice Log – 3

You Die – 3

A Friend Dies (Story) – Shot

Lara Says She Hates Raiding Tombs – Shot

 

Skyrim Drinking Game

Players: 1

PS3, 360, PC


Skyrim has been out for ages now, and, having just jumped back into it, it’s as addicting as ever. I decided to write up a drinking game for it simply because I wanted to revisit the gorgeous countryside and reanimating dead corpses, but I wasn’t sure it was going to be the best material to drink to. I was wrong. There are a few recurring elements that walk the edge of comical at how often they pop up, usually within succession. It’s a bit of a shorter list than usual, but it works. Let’s get into it.

skyrim artowrk

You know how Tyler Durden “re-imagines” himself as Brad Pitt? That’s this guy for me.

Story Drinks

Any form of the word “Dragon” is mentioned – be prepared.

Skyrim is mentioned.

Someone comments on your race, gender, appearance.

Someone asks if you’re sick.

Any of the recruiting groups are mentioned – Legion, Stormcloaks, Thieves Guild, etc.

Slagathor in Skyrim - Character Creator

Slagathor is harassed pretty consistently in Skyrim.

Mechanical Drinks

You level up – drink the number of your new level.

Any skill goes up.

Fail a lockpick attempt – drink for each broken pin.

Fail a conversation attempt – persuade, intimidate, etc.

You find some kind of alcohol in a chest / container. Drink for each one.

Drink 5 for death – make it a shot if it’s from a trap.

Take a shot if you let your horse die because shame on you.

Dead horse Skyrim

You fucking fucks.

All I can say is a few conversations with the Jarl and the Greybeards about dragons and dragonborn, and you’re gonna forget you already accidentally killed your horse three goddamn times.

Dragon Age: Origins Drinking Game

Players: 1

PS3, 360, PC


Dragon Age is probably my favorite of Bioware’s game series. I might be a bigger advocate of Mass Effect, but I tend to lean towards fantasy over sci-fi as a general theme. That’s not really important here, though. You’re here because you want to get drunk. Or you’re lost. Either way, you might as well finish reading this article.

Dragon Age Origins Inventory Screen

That’s right. Slagathor continues in Ferelden.

This is a single player drinking game, but you’re always free to let friends join you with the same or modified rules. Every drink cue will be worth one drink unless otherwise specified. I’ll break them up into categories to make them a bit easier to reference for you. You’re fucking welcome.

Story

Grey Wardens are Mentioned

The Maker is Mentioned

The Blight is Mentioned

Racism is Apparent 

Someone Curses

Loghain is On Screen (stops applying if you recruit him.. unless you hate yourself)

Someone Takes a Drink

Sandal says “Enchantment”

Someone Thanks The Maker When They Clearly Should be Thanking You

Party Member Disapproves – Drink For Each Point

Make the Decision to Kill Someone – Shot


Party Members

Alistair is Sarcastic

Morrigan is Heartless

Sten Gives One Word Answer

Leliana is Over Considerate

Wynne is Concerned About The Maker

Oghren is Bitter

Shale is Condescending

Loghain… I Don’t Know; I Never Let Him Live


Mechanical

A Dialogue Option Appears With Drinking

Your Character Does a Special Finishing Move (Best Played With Melee Character)

Level Up on any Character

Accidentally Pull Out Weapon

Game Appears to Freeze

Party Member Falls in Battle

Accidentally Speak to Party Member When Trying to Click an Item

Game Over – Shot

dragon age dragon kill

If you get a sweet Dragon kill like this, everyone else finishes their drinks. If you don’t have friends, you finish your drink.

Limbo Drinking Game

Players: 1-??

PS3, PS4, Wii U, Xbox 360, Mobile, PC


Limbo is one of my favorite Indie Games of all time. It’s creepy as hell, all while delivering a truly interesting puzzle platforming experience. The best part of it, though, is all of the wonderful ways you can die. And you die pretty consistently. You can be dismembered, smashed, drowned – you can see where this is going.

limbo screenshot

Death by zipline is my preference.

So, you can certainly play this game alone, but I’d say it’s definitely better with friends so you can start yelling at each other. I’m actually stealing a bit of the strategy from our Flappy Bird game, but I’m tweaking it to make sense for this one. It has the possibility to get brutal, so I hope you’re ready to forget the rest of your evening (or morning, no judgement).

drunk in the morning

Round two begins in 45, troops.

The Rules

As I mentioned before, you die a lot in Limbo. A stupid amount. Bunches. So…

Take a drink if you die, and pass the controller.*

That’s not so bad, right?

* – If any previous player has already died in this spot, increase death drinks by 1.

Oh.

So, to spell it out a bit, if you die in the same spot as your best friend Larry, you now have to take 2 drinks every time you die. If this happens again, it’s 3 drinks, and so on and so forth. And this applies to everyone’s death drinks. So, even if Tiny Tim is the one that keeps dying in the repeat spots, you still have to up your death drinks.

I like that term. Death drinks. I think I’ll save it for my inevitable Dark Souls game. Tiny Tim will probably screw you over in that one, too. Fuck Tiny Tim.

drunk tiny tim

More whiskey, Scrooge.

I’m really interested to see if anyone finishes the game by these rules. It’s not impossible, but you’ll probably have to have played it a few times before and generally just be good at it.

So, if you do happen to be playing with an asshole that is really good at the game, here are a few additional rules to help keep some of the beer flowing:

Drink for…

  • Spider / monster appearance
  • Another human on screen, dead / alive
  • Something startles you
  • Something alters your character’s abilities / movement
  • A shot for a sighting of your sister

Extreme Mode

Up the death drinks for every time anyone dies.

Have fun. Don’t die yourself.

X-COM: Enemy Within Drinking Game

Players: 2-6

PS3, PS4, Xbox 360, Xbox One, PC


X-COM is an excellent turn-based RPG focused around training soldiers to fight the incoming alien threat. Soldiers are highly customizable and level up through a skill tree as they advance in military rank. One of the notable features of the game is that when a solider dies in the field, they are dead forever – if you don’t restart the game in rage.

For our drinking game, it’s a long play. The drinks start off slow if you’re starting from the very beginning, but they quickly start to ramp up after you get through the introductory phase. If you’re looking for a good hammering, you can get a game started before going into the bingeing streak.

The Set Up

The main feature we’re using to exploit drinks in X-COM is character creation and management. What you want to do after getting through the tutorial phase is create characters for each player. Depending on how many people you have playing, you’ll want to make multiple variations of each player. It is best if you make an equal amount for each player.

After creating your characters, you want to find missions to go on. You want to make sure an equal number of each player are going on the mission. Now, the fun begins…

10

Drinks

Your character hits an enemy: Give the amount of damage you hit with – up to the end of the enemy’s health bar. If you hit the enemy for 6 damage, but it only has 4 health remaining, give 4 drinks.

Your character is hit: Take as many drinks as you’re hit for, up to the amount of health you have remaining (same as rule above).

Your character scores a critical hit: Take a recoil drink for yourself – you deserve it.

Go a round with no damage either way: Social

Shots

Your character dies – Take

Your character is promoted – Give

You generate friendly fire – The person controlling and the person’s character hit both take

Extreme Mode

Take off remaining health limitations on drinks.

Drink every time anyone says “Commander.” (via @HettyTheChemist)


Now go and enjoy X-COM the best way possible!